For When We're Discouraged From Doing the Lord's Work

When you undertake the Lord's work, you can expect challenges, setbacks, and disappointment. It's simply a fact that often as soon as the Lord reveals His will for you, someone or something will come along to discourage you. 

Whether that work is a ministry you've started or work with, homeschooling your children, leading a Bible class or study, or rebuilding the temple of God--whatever God has called you to--expect that Satan is going to be on the attack. 

He is looking for ways to undermine the Lord's work, to discourage us so we will throw up our hands in defeat and walk away. He is hurling obstacles at us left and right so we will eventually miss the dodge and simply surrender. 

But I beg you, do not be discouraged.

Remember Jesus' words: 

"In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."  

John 16:33

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Do you remember how the tribes of Judah and Benjamin returned to Jerusalem after the exile to rebuild God's temple? 
Do you remember all the opposition they faced from enemies who did not want them to succeed? 

"Then the peoples around them set out to discourage the people of Judah and make them afraid to go on building. They hired counselors to frustrate their plans during the entire reign of Cyrus king of Persia and down to the reign of Darius king of Persia." 

Ezra 4:4-5

Satan uses discouragement and frustration to keep us from doing the Lord's work just as he tried to keep Israel from rebuilding the temple. Even within the church this happens. It's sad but so true.

Discouragement stifles motivation. It eats away at our once beautifully laid plans and makes us question what we're doing and if it truly is the Lord's will. All the energy and effort begin to seem like a waste. Yet if what we're doing is truly God's will, then we must persevere.

So what do we do? 

We either quit and Satan wins, or we seek the Lord, recommit ourselves to the task, and get back to work. 

The enemies of Judah and Benjamin worked for many years to frustrate the Lord's work, even lodging complaints to the Persian king, which worked. Temporarily. 

Sometimes God allows His work to be stopped, not because of us necessarily, but for His own purposes. He is in control, and we must trust in Him even when we are discouraged and do not understand His ways. However, like Israel, we need to be vigilant, ready for a door to open so we can set to work again.

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In Ezra 5 we read how Zerubbabel and Jeshua resumed work on the temple and how "the prophets of God were with them, helping them" (verse 2):"[T]he eye of their God" was on them, and the builders were encouraged to resume their work. 

Eventually, the temple was finished, and 

"[f]or seven days they celebrated with joy the Feast of Unleavened Bread, because the Lord had filled them with joy by changing the attitude of the king of Assyria, so that he assisted them in the work on the house of God, the God of Israel." 

Ezra 6:22

Discouragement can keep us from doing the Lord's work, but often only because we let it. If God has a plan, He will see it to completion. Trust in that. He is faithful and will never abandon you. 

Whatever is discouraging you today--whether it's putting together your curriculum and plans for a new school year or attempting to minister to others at church, in your community, or in the world, or trying to affect change in a much-needed area in your own life--turn it over to the Lord. Do not be discouraged. He will see you through because He loves you. 

"And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge--that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God." 

Ephesians 4:17b-19

I'm praying for you today,

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My Biggest Fear about Homeschooling & What I Intend to Do About It

Photo credit: Elizabeth Albert

This past week I made the executive decision not to send our oldest daughter to preschool or another Mother's Day Out program. Instead, I conceded to something I've been (and still am) reluctant to do: homeschool her. 

My biggest fear about homeschooling isn't that I'm not qualified (I used to teach) or that my kids won't be socialized (Not a concern). It isn't that we can't afford it (Homeschooling is much cheaper than preschool) or that I'll be overwhelmed (I will be).  

No, my biggest fear is that I will never have another minute all to myself ever again. 

Selfish. 

I know.

I love my kids. But I also look forward to the peace and quiet that I have those two days a week when the older two are away, when it's just me and the baby, to piddle, mop floors, go shopping, read a book, and simply exist without noise.

And yet I know that to homeschool is to give my child the academic support she needs, the guidance she craves, and the one-on-one shepherding I'm called to administer. 

More importantly, I believe God is leading me to homeschool even as I'm railing against it.

Photo credit: vastateparksstaff

 

Because I know right now I'm going to need some downtime if I'm going to homeschool, here are 10 steps I'm taking to succeed.

1. Take baby steps. If I'm going to do this, I need to start out small. I've tried to work with my oldest with the toddler at home, and it's just too stressful for me: busy bags, work boxes or not. That means keeping my toddler in Mother's Day Out two days a week. Eventually, I hope to homeschool all three kids, but for now I need to take it slow.

2. Enlist help. I'm blessed to have wonderful parents and in-laws who are always willing to help out at a moment's notice. I need to let them, especially when I need a break or just to run to the grocery store without three kids in tow. 

3. Plan downtime during the day. Del from Devote & Seek mentioned on Facebook that she plans downtime each day by taking breaks and not dragging out the school day longer than necessary. That sounds like good advice to me. I'm thinking that we will have some morning quiet time after lessons and before lunch for both of us to relax and unwind, and the rest of the day will be spent reading and playing.

4. Have fun! I have to remember my daughter is only 4, not 14. She doesn't need hours of drills and worksheets; she needs short, fun, hands-on activities that engage and inspire her to want to learn and plenty of good books to read.

5. Seek my husband's help. When I inevitably get frustrated, I will need to let my husband know before I blow up so he can lend a hand or give me an "escape." Fortunately for me, he's pretty adept at juggling three kids while Mama's away.

6. Go to the gym. Our gym has excellent child care, so I can work out (or take a shower, nap, read a book) while the kids are supervised and playing. For days when I need a breather, the gym will be the place we go.

7. Institute daily quiet time/nap time & blanket time/room time. Our girls still nap in the afternoons, so that's a good 2 hour chunk of time when I can unwind, drink a cup of tea, and relax in quiet. But even on days when no one sleeps, we will still have quiet time because we all need it! We also have blanket time most afternoons where the girls sit quietly on their blankets and play while I cook, clean, or whatever. Soon, I plan to transition from blanket to room time with the older girls.

8. Get a babysitter. This may never happen because (1) I have great family and (2) I'm cheap, but knowing that I have the option is key to my sanity. 

9. Go outside. I've found that being stuck inside these 4 walls all day can really enervate me. By taking a few minutes to play outside gives the kids and me fresh air to breathe and space to run. Some days we may just need to take a trip outdoors.

10. Pray!  I have already started to pray for my heart towards my children: for gentleness and compassion, for patience and mercy in dealing with them as we embark on the homeschooling endeavor. I also pray that God will show me if this is no longer the path He wants me to take and what He wants me to do instead.

I believe that if God wills for something to happen, He will make a way. Of course that will inevitably involve some serious refining in me, so I'm praying earnestly now that He will gently ease me into my new situation.

What about you? How do you find downtime as a homeschooling or non-homeschooling Mom? Any tips for me?

Praying God's blessings on you,

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"What If She Doesn't Like Me?"

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Ever since middle school when my best friend ditched me for the cool kids, I have feared being rejected. 

It's not a nice feeling. 

     Being ignored, overlooked, cast aside, left out.

     Being discarded like a moth-eaten sweater. 

Over the years I have worked very hard to avoid that feeling.

How?

By playing it safe. 

By never really opening myself up. 

By keeping my distance.

By hiding behind the mask of "I'm fine. My life is perfect. I have no problems." 

That way no one will think less of me or see my insecurities, my neediness, my not-good-enough-ness.

My reasoning has always been that if I don't share who I am--the good, the bad, and the ugly--then no one can reject me. 

By not taking the risk of sharing myself with others, 

Yes, I have protected my heart.

Yes, I have kept myself from rejection.

Yes, I have painted a pretty picture of myself.

But, I have also:

Isolated myself. 

Missed out on many opportunities for lasting friendships. 

Lied to myself and others.

Stayed in my comfort zone so long that I am getting uncomfortable in it.

Can you relate?

It's easy for us as women to create and hide behind masks. We avoid vulnerability, even with other women, because we don't want to be hurt again. It's often safer to feign "fineness" rather than open ourselves up to others and risk rejection. 

The Solution

In Grace for the Good Girl, Emily Freeman hits the nail on the head when she shares the solution to conquering her own fears of rejection and vulnerability:

"Honesty before God is the only safe place, and I believe he is wise enough and loving enough and intuitive enough to usher us into honesty with people... A lot of my own heartache and struggles with the fake fine mask could be overcome if I simply allowed myself to be honest with God and trust him to lead me in being vulnerable with people" (55-56).

Being honest with God and trusting in Him to help us be vulnerable with people requires believing that He wants what is best for us and knowing that He promises to protect us:

 

"For in the day of trouble

     he will keep me safe in his dwelling;

he will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle

     and set me high upon a rock."

Psalm 27:5

It means believing God will emancipate us from our fears if we earnestly seek Him:

"I sought the Lord, and he answered me;

     he delivered me from all my fears."

Psalm 34:4

God loves us.  

Any fears we have, whether fears of rejection, being alone, or not-good-enough-ness, are not from our loving Father but from Satan, the father of lies.

In 2 Timothy 1:17, Paul tells Timothy:

"For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline."

We need to stop trying to control our lives and give our King the opportunity to reign fully and completely within us. 

That means...

     Turning our fears over to Him.

     Trusting Him to take those unnecessary worries away.

     Being honest with ourselves and others.

     Allowing God to give us the relationships we desire.

     Removing the mask so others can see us for who we really are.

In the grand scheme of things, it doesn't matter how many people reject us as long as we know to whom we will always belong.

Do you grapple with the fear of rejection? Can you turn it over to God today?

Praying God's richest blessings for you,

 Keri

 

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